Happy April Fools Day!
Sadly I will not be reviewing Cat in the Hat today, I will be doing something a little different to celebrate this Wacky Day. To celebrate Fool’s Day, here is my top 5 funniest list and the quotes that made me laugh for days.
5. Caleb Jacobson, Significant, Shelly Crane
“Gran, I’m only gonna ask this once. Please don’t have sex talks with me, ok? Especially with Maggie in the room. Do you think we could do that?”
4. Aelyx, Alienated, Melissa Landers
“It’s common knowledge that shiny rocks are preferred among human females.”
“Aelyx’s voice was guarded when he said, “Our geneticists terminated the program.”
“Because we all started growing tentacles.”
Her eyes opened wide. “Really?”
“No,” he said, totally deadpan. “Not really.”
Damn, she’d walked right into that one.”
3. Katy Swartz, Lux Series by Jennifer L. Armentrout
“Beautiful face. Beautiful body. Horrible attitude. It was the holy trinity of hot boys.”
“The day my internet was hooked up was better than having a hot guy check out my butt and ask for my phone number.”
2. Anna Whitt, Sweet Evil, Wendy Higgins
“He was smoking hot. As in H-O-T-T, hott. I’d never understood until that moment why girls insisted on adding an extra t. This guy was extra-t-worthy.”
“Nine hours, two pizzas, one fight, three instances of vomiting, a million whistles, tons of snacks, and countless drinks later, we learned that I could have one drink every eighteen minutes, or three in one hour. Absolutely no more. Even with my body’s ability to burn the alcohol, I was what my father deemed a “lightweight” or “cheap date.”
1. Jace Wayland, Mortal Instruments, Cassandra Clare
I couldn’t choose just two:
“I am a man” he told her, “and men do not consume pink beverages. Get thee gone woman, and bring me something brown.”
“Did you ever think that in a past life Alec was an old woman with ninety cats who was always yelling at the neighborhood kids to get off her lawn? Because I do,”
“I don’t want to be a man,” said Jace. “I want to be an angst-ridden teenager who can’t confront his own inner demons and takes it out verbally on other people instead.”
“Well,” said Luke, “you’re doing a fantastic job.”
Which of these quotes were the best in your opinion?